Are you living in a constant state of stress?

Are you living in a constant state of stress? Sometimes, if we are not careful, we begin to let the fear of the future &/or the negativity of the past rule our present lives. When we do this, we are training our mind & body to live in survival mode. Survival mode keeps us in fear, keeps us releasing stress chemicals & soon enough we are living in “fight or flight” 24/7 - having horrible effects on our body & mind over time, leaving little room for anything positive.

Our minds, more specifically, our thoughts, tell our bodies what to do & how to act - including what chemicals & hormones to release. Have you ever been talking to a friend and told them a story of how another person really pissed you off? If you really got into the details, recalling every moment that upset you, you could actually feel your body reacting to the thought just as it did to the actual event. Now you are wound up and just as upset as you were when the event actually took place. But is that what we really want? Do we want to constantly stay in a state of anger and hurt? Or maybe you’re an expert in anticipating the future and your expertise is to react to something that hasn’t even happened yet. You rehearse all of the stress & negative emotions before they are actually triggered in your body by an outside event. Instead, you trigger them with your thoughts alone, in turn, experiencing exactly what you want to avoid before it even happens, (or if it even happens - all of that may be for nothing!).

What a wild way to live, right? Causing the pain for ourselves that we are trying to avoid. Rehearsing our stress response to something that may never come to fruition. Reliving the past that we claim we wish never happened. We can all agree that this sounds less than ideal, but we do it so often. So my challenge to you this week is to live in the now. Stay out of thoughts of the past or future & stay in the present. Whenever you feel yourself drifting into thoughts that produce stress or negativity, stop and evaluate…is this happening right now? Or is this a past or potential future event that I am responding to emotionally? Stop where you are and look for things in the present moment to be grateful & joyful about - a cool breeze, the sun shining, the roof over your head, your lungs that are able to successfully fill up with air. These are not things that should be taken for granted. As you’ve heard before, what if you woke up tomorrow with only that which you were grateful for today? So moving forward, let’s guard our thoughts & create the states within ourselves that we want to live in - joy, happiness & love.

There is so much beauty on the other side of the storm

​ Yesterday, in my neck of the woods, we were graced with a beautiful rainbow. It was amazing to watch the whole event from beginning to end. At the start, we sat under a bright blue sky - illuminated by the sun. Soon, without warning, we watched the dark & stormy clouds forming in the distance. An accumulation of dark grays & purples swirled in the atmosphere to create their massive shape and presence. As they built up in strength & size, they began to take over the space above us. They rolled in overhead - pushing out all of the light & airy blue that was previously consuming the space​,​ and ​they ​replaced it with a heaviness, like a bully in the school yard.

Soon, as it always does, the levy broke. The clouds became so full that they could not hold back any longer and they rained down on us - releasing everything that had been building up within them over time. The interesting thing is, by this point we were driving to the store and as we moved through the storm, the sun hung low on the horizon ahead. It was like a lighthouse on the water. The rain was pouring down all around us, but the sun was glowing beyond the clouds, illuminating the road ahead, turning everything within its reach to gold. Despite all of the chaos that was happening around us. , the sun never left. It just stayed there like it was reminding us that while it was storming now, it won’t last forever.

As we got closer to our destination, we saw the rainbow; a double rainbow in fact. It was the most breathtaking rainbow I’ve ever seen. Its colors were so vivid and its presence could not be ignored. It broke through the rain and went straight to our hearts. It took up the entire sky with its perfect arch and magical luminosity; you could not look away from its breathtaking beauty. As we entered the parking lot, we saw crowds of people stopped in awe of its beauty. Everyone was at a complete stand still looking up to the sky with a wonderment radiating from them, like crowds of children seeing Santa ride off in his sleigh over head​ on Christmas eve​. It was amazing to see the effect this rainbow had on so many people.

As we all observed in amazement, it’s like a joy washed over everyone. Our spirits were being lifted up beyond our current world to a place filled with only bliss. People began to radiate that same glowing, beauty that the rainbow did and we all felt united in experiencing this miraculous gift, together. It is truly amazing what God can do. Yesterday he reminded us to believe in the magic of this world, to remember that there is so much beauty on the other side of the storm, and to know that he is using both the sun and the rain to create our miracle.

You need you at your best.

As we go into this new week, I want to remind you to make time every morning to align your spirit for the day that lies ahead . As things continue to get busier & busier, it's so easy to compromise on time for ourselves when we give so much of ourselves to others & have so much to do each day. This is a big mistake! Have you ever noticed how you feel when you are rushing out the door to an event or an appointment and just how frazzled you feel? Now you become extra sensitive to all of the little road bumps you may experience, every red light, every pedestrian you have to slow down for...the things you would normally just brush off seem to really get to you, all because of how you started your day. Usually, the people that get the brunt of this are the ones closest to us. We are extra short or lack patience all because we didn't make time for ourselves first, so we have the best version of ourselves to give to others (and to ourselves). So as your "to do" list gets longer, make sure not to skip the most important part of your day - time for yourself each morning to write down all that you are grateful about, time to decide how you will show up in the world that day, time to sit in the stillness and reflect on how you're feeling & what you really need.

As the saying goes, put your oxygen mask on first this week. You aren't doing anyone any favors by neglecting your own self care and well being . This world needs you at your best, your loved ones need you at your best, and you need you at your best - you deserve it. Let's make it a great week!

With love, Elyse

April Showers bring May Flowers

Good morning & happy new month!

While you can reflect on your life & make changes at any time, a new month tends to be a good marker to stop to evaluate what's working & what's not. As we take on the second day of May, take some time this week to reflect on your April. Pick out 3 things that went really well, 3 things you're proud about & 1 new commitment you'll make to yourself for this month. This could be taking a step toward a health goal, like walking for 30 minutes 3x a week, or even something like waking up 30 minutes earlier to meditate each day, just make sure it's something you can take action on! Taking the time to take an honest look at what's working in our lives & what's not is the only way we can build the lives we want rather than staying a victim of our circumstances - and this is the perfect time of the year to do it!

I don't know about you, but April is always a little crazy for me. Looking back, I tend to make big changes around this time of year. Maybe it's the season for it. If we look to nature, we see that in April things that have laid dormant for so many winter months suddenly come alive . I guess that happens with us too. All of the thoughts & feelings that have been brewing under the surface suddenly make themselves impossible to ignore. And with this new awareness comes choices. And with choices come changes. Change is never easy, no matter how sure you are that it's for the better. With change comes grief for what you've left behind & with grief comes tears - April showers . But just as it happens in nature, April showers bring May flowers & soon the new flowers in your life will bloom. Soon all of those rainy days will make sense when you see all of the beauty they produced.

With love,

-Elyse

Life is what you make it

We've all heard, "life is what you make it," so what are you making of it? Is your day ruling you, or are you ruling your day? This week, be sure to make time for something that lifts your heart every day. If you aren't intentional about doing things that bring you joy every day, gravity will pull you down, & if you let it...keep you there. This does not have to be anything spectacular or extravagant, (in fact, if it is, it's probably just another dopamine rush, not real joy). Joy is about cultivating happiness in the little moments of your day, in slowing down to notice the miracles all around you.

I know it feels like you don't have time to stop and smell the roses, but you do. If you audit your day, there is so much time wasted on things that actually cause us more stress, more agitation & more anxiety - like screen time, for example (check out the research if you don't believe me). So why not swap out some of that scrolling for something that really makes you happy? This week, make time for joy. Stop for frozen yogurt, take a walk outside in nature, lay in the grass & look up at the sky to find shapes in the clouds...you deserve it.